Calibration-Debunking the Myth about Work-Life Balance

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Do you struggle with work/ life balance? Yes! Well, we all do. Welcome to the real world!

 

We heard about this over and over again. We incessantly hear ourselves that there’s not enough time in the world. I am guilty of this…well, I don’t know better then.

 

My work at Avant-garde led me to myriad of human experiences and encounters with how much people complain, whine and vent about NOT KNOWING how to balance life. The incessant complaining that we don’t have enough time to enjoy with what is most valuable to us drains me. We do this day in and day out.

 

So, it led me to the word “calibration.”

 

Calibration is the capacity to invoke our core values to heighten important aspects of our life (work or life) within the parameters of time we were given.

 

Calibrating is knowing WHEN to spend such considerable amount of time and how to compensate for the other. Then, calibrate by being able to say NO so we you can spend the quality time with those most important to us.

 

I remember listening to one of the audio CDs from life leadership…saying, millionaires has 24 hours in a day, the poorest people also has 24 hours in a day, the greatest or most admired leaders has 24 hours in a day and the laggard employees has 24 hours in a day. Get it?! We all live in a 24 hour day cycle but it’s how you spend the time is what matters most.

 

KNOWING when, to whom, and what you spend it with towards living according to your vision of your life.

 

I also heard about this term over and over again in my group coaching workshops….”it’s not how much you spend your time, it’s the quality you spend it. Wow! That was real, authentic and true for all of us. That was true learning…such reawakening.

 

Now, the question is: how do we know what “quality” time looks like?  Well, my question for you is: do you know what your life purpose is? Do you know what your core values are? Are you aware of your limiting beliefs so you know when and how to eliminate it?  — that is where you start!

 

Calibration requires you to be fiercely courageous, authentic and determine. This is a CHOSEN lifestyle of intentional living….day in and out!

 

Calibrating work and life is a CHOICE! I dare you to consciously choose to calibrate!

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Comments (27)

  1. Mahal Hudson - Reply

    October 15, 2015 at 10:45 am

    Blog featured at The Wellness Universe: http://thewellnessuniverse.com/finding-balance-through-calibration/

  2. Fania - Reply

    September 14, 2015 at 8:00 pm

    Great topic Mahal.

    Erica, I agree with you that entrepreneurs work harder and longer hours than employees, because they are IT! As an entrepreneur one has the freedom, but with freedom come lots of responsibilities, hence more time commitment.
    However, it does not have to be like that on an ongoing basis. Usually entrepreneurs need to front load the business, in order to have the freedom of time and hopefully money, to enjoy the most precious things in life.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 16, 2015 at 12:02 am

      Thanks Fania for dropping by!

      Entrepreneurship is larger than life. It asks for bigger responsibilities moreso, it asks more time from us. BUT, it comes with a great payoff! Loving entrepreneurship!

  3. Jeri - Reply

    September 14, 2015 at 7:21 pm

    Needs for time balance shift from time to time depending on what’s going on in our lives. What I most fear is getting stuck in a rut–doing something because I feel obligated to do so, whether that something is work or play.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 16, 2015 at 12:05 am

      It does shift and when it does, we need to further calibrate. I think as we progress in life, just as we progress in Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, we must continue to be brave enough to make better choices, ergo better life. Just my perspective.

      Thanks for sharing your wisdom, Jeri.

  4. Patricia Weber - Reply

    September 14, 2015 at 12:25 pm

    I love this word calibration Mahal. Actually I “re-calibrated” about 3 or 4 years ago using my true values. Except for unexpected happenings – family deaths, family announced situations – I can tell you this works. My life feels more in balance these days.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 16, 2015 at 12:08 am

      Thank you Patricia for sharing your “re-calibrated” life. I take that as discerning and willing mover of life.

  5. Doreen Pendgracs - Reply

    September 14, 2015 at 9:31 am

    Interesting post, Mahal. I had not previously heard the term calibration connected to the concept of life balance before. It is definitely something I have to be conscious of daily, as my life is filled with so many facets vying for my time and attention. I have to put more of an effort into calibrating my priorities and try not to let others interfere with them.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 16, 2015 at 12:13 am

      I’m glad you found the blog interesting, Doreen.

      When I created the concept, I was imagining a volatile element in an enclosed test tube. I could see it moving from side to side yet so fluid depending on how we hold the test tube. And viola…calibration! Hope that makes sense. But, what you shared does seems to make sense. Setting priorities and not let others interfere.

  6. Sabrina Q. - Reply

    September 13, 2015 at 12:11 pm

    Calibration is an interesting word! I like it. I always felt that balance was the wrong word to use because it is not about balance of life. It is about dealing with what needs to be handled in both personal and business. The more flexible you are in your processes and your willingness to change, will help you deal with all the responsibilities. Thanks for sharing.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 13, 2015 at 11:16 pm

      You pointed out a critical aspect in “calibration” (loved that you find that word interesting-thank you!)…it’s about “willingness to change.” The word “willingness” was spot on!

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

  7. Ken Dowell - Reply

    September 13, 2015 at 11:23 am

    One of the hardest things to calibrate is work. Is it a life mission? Or is it a way to make a living, to provide for your family, to achieve some level of comfort in your other life? Everyone wants their work to be the former, but if it is does that in itself through off you balance?

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 13, 2015 at 11:19 pm

      You are right Ken to post this question…is work our life mission or it’s JUST a way to make a living?
      Well, is making a living actually killing us? Then yes, this totally throws us off balance. A harsh reality that we often disregard but cannot be ignored. Thanks for pointing it out to us.

  8. Jason Butler - Reply

    September 13, 2015 at 9:12 am

    Interesting concept. I’m not really sure if everyone can have a work/life balance. Some people really go too hard when it comes to their work. In my opinion it comes down to making a schedule and sticking to it. That works for me most of the time.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 13, 2015 at 11:22 pm

      Thank you Jason for finding this concept interesting.

      Yes, “sticking to it” is effective yet, like you said, is hard. And my next challenge for all of us…why is that?

      When will we stop sacrificing our joy?

  9. Marquita Herald - Reply

    September 13, 2015 at 7:03 am

    important topic Mahal. Personally I don’t believe there is such a thing as work / life balance – it’s becoming intentional about what you want in life, establishing your priorities and then focusing everything you do on supporting those priorities. Much easier said than done for most people, but it’s certainly worth the effort.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 13, 2015 at 11:25 pm

      It is certainly worth the effort…to establish our priorities and stay focus with it. Moreso, it is certainly worth it to do just that. Once we start valuing ourselves than looking for it elsewhere, we start to calibrate.

      Thank you Marquita for your wisdom.

  10. Lenie - Reply

    September 13, 2015 at 4:28 am

    Mahal, when I was still in the workforce I felt that I had to do it all – exactly like you said. It wasn’t so much that I wanted to – I was just so busy I didn’t ever have the time to evaluate, until I got sick which I think is often the result of not ‘calibrating’. We need to stop and take the time to set our priorities, which include family, work and recreation.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 13, 2015 at 11:49 pm

      Thank you for sharing this Lenie. When we failed to focus in our well-being, we sacrifice the important things in our life….including our health.

      Yes, we need to stop balancing because it does not work….we should start calibrating!

  11. Suzanne Fluhr - Reply

    September 13, 2015 at 1:07 am

    During the 20 years I was raising 2 sons (with my husband) and working as a full time lawyer (including many years in that entrepreneur trap with my own firm), I had to do a lot of “calibration”. Frankly, it took a toll on my health. I frequently felt like i wasn’t doing the job I wanted to be doing in either endeavor. The problem is that when you’re in the middle of the trees, it can sometimes be very difficult to see the trees. Maybe we need to issue ourselves drones so we can see the big picture better. (I’m mixing all sorts of metaphors here.) The truth is, I’ve finished being a full time mother (our sons are adults and living independently) and being a full time lawyer. I feel as though I’m entering a new phase of my life and I am going to try to be more “present” and “intentful” in the way I reorder my life and priorities.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 13, 2015 at 11:57 pm

      Thank you for sharing your story Suzanne. I think a lot of us can relate with you.

      Love the idea of drones!

      I wish you all the best with being “present” and “intentful” in the exciting, upcoming phase of your journey.

  12. Jacqueline Gum - Reply

    September 12, 2015 at 9:34 pm

    As to life’s purpose, that’s one for the ages and frankly I think we spend too much time thinking we need a definitive answer to this oh so big question. Core values… integrity, truth, compassion…I think if each of really concentrated on living a life based on these values…and I mean really doing it, rather than talking about it, that would be purposeful life. Because it takes a great deal of courage to really practice these principals, and I fear not enough people are up to the challenge. Not because they are bad people, mind you, because it’s just easier not to.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 12, 2015 at 10:48 pm

      You are right Jacqueline, not a lot of people take ACTION about this, ergo I came up with “calibration.”

      In my leadership workshop, this was the main “excuse” I heard over and over again. I must say, when I introduced the concept, they suddenly realized the truth about their excuses.

      Thanks for sharing the challenge.

  13. Erica - Reply

    September 12, 2015 at 8:56 pm

    Thank you for this post. I think most of us entrepreneurs spend too much time working. It is an odd scenario. We leave our jobs to not have to answer to someone else and to create our own schedule, and then we demand of ourselves that we work around the clock. You are right that it is a choice, and it is up to each and every one of us to create balance in our own lives. Very valuable post.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 12, 2015 at 10:51 pm

      Thank you Erica for your feedback.

      What an irony for entrepreneurs right! Thank you for that perspective.

      Ultimately, it’s a choice….a reminder that all of us need (I think most of the time).

  14. Phoenicia - Reply

    September 12, 2015 at 6:37 pm

    If we were given more time, we would fill it with more tasks and still feel there was not enough!

    Prioritising comes before time management.

    • Mahal Hudson - Reply

      September 12, 2015 at 10:58 pm

      You are right Phoenica, it will never be always enough therefore calibration is the answer.

      Thanks for emphasizing it.

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